There’s a quiet moment that arrives in parenthood that no one truly prepares you for. It’s the moment you realize your child is no longer a little child. My oldest turns 17 today. Seventeen! I say it out loud, and it still feels surreal, like time gently slipped through my hands while I was busy packing lunches, tying shoes, cheering from the sidelines, and learning how to be someone’s safe place in this world. I am so excited for him. I truly am. I’m excited for the life he’s building, the thoughts he’s forming, the independence he’s discovering, and the man he is becoming. But if I’m being completely honest, there’s also a quiet sadness that sits beside that excitement. A tender awareness that this is the final year of his boyhood before he is technically an adult, and that realization definitely caught me off guard. Because when I look at him, I still see the little guy who never wanted to leave my side. The one who loved cuddles and kisses and our “mommy and me” time. The one who ran and jumped through the house pretending to be Spider-Man, convinced he was Captain America, and who could spend hours watching cars with complete wonder. My sweet little Beaner Boss. That version of him will always live lovingly in my heart.
But today, when I look at him, I also see the young man standing in front of me. He towers over me now, where he once looked up at me. He has the same beautiful brown eyes and that same inquisitive look, but his world is bigger. He has friends, responsibilities, ideas, opinions, and a freedom that is growing by the day. Our time together looks different now. We still have our “him and me” time — it’s just more mature, filled with deeper conversations and shared laughter over sports and life. Long gone are the days of YouTube unboxing videos and the endless inquisitive questions like, “Who would win in a fight?” Those moments have been replaced with something just as special, a friendship that has grown alongside him. I still get hugs, sometimes a quick peck on the cheek, and moments of connection that are quieter but just as meaningful. He still asks me for help, but now he helps me too, and honestely, in more ways than he will ever know.
Coming to Peace with the Versions of the Ones We Love
As parents, we hold every version of our children inside us. The toddler, the little kid, the tween, the teenager. We remember who they were so vividly that sometimes it can make who they are now feel a little bittersweet. But that's growth, and growth was always the goal. We weren’t raising children to keep them small. We were raising them to become themselves. Making peace with our children growing up doesn’t mean letting go of who they were. It means honouring every version while fully embracing who they are today. It means understanding that love evolves, connection evolves, and relationships mature. We can miss the little hands that once reached for us, while appreciating the strong ones they now use to build their lives. We can remember the bedtime stories as we listen to their big dreams. We can hold the beautiful memories while celebrating the present. Both can exist at the same time.
A Heart That Expands, Not Breaks
My son was the first of two people in the world to hear my heartbeat from inside, and I was the first person to hear his. That connection never leaves. It only changes form. He is my heart. A beautiful soul who chose me to be his mom. Kind, thoughtful, brilliant, and full of love. He surprises me constantly with his compassion and the man he is becoming. And while a part of me will always remember the little boy who wanted only me, I am in awe of the young man standing in front of me now. This season of parenting asks us to stretch. To loosen our grip while deepening our trust. To celebrate who our children are becoming without clinging too tightly to who they were. It asks us to live in gratitude. Because what a privilege it is to watch a human grow. What a blessing to witness their unfolding. And what a sacred, beautiful role it is to be chosen as “Mom.
A Gentle Reminder for Parents in This Season
If you’re finding yourself emotional as your children grow older, you’re not alone. This is tender territory. This is love expanding. This is what it means to have a heart that remembers every incredilbe version. We will forever remember our children for who they were, and we are so deeply blessed to witness who they are becoming! So today, I choose peace. I choose gratitude. I choose to stand in awe of the young man before me while holding every sweet memory of the little boy who once fit perfectly in my arms.
Forever grateful. Forever in awe. Forever his mom. ❤️
Cheers,
Coach Jo ❤️
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