From “Struggle Bus” to Steering My Own Joy Ride

If there’s one thing I’ve learned lately, it’s that you can have everything you dreamed of and still have days where you feel stuck, tired, or downright unmotivated. This summer, I married the love of my life , he's honestly the sweetest soul I’ve ever known. My kids are thriving. Our home life is safe and happy. My dad lives with us, and right now, life is stable and full of love. On paper, I should be happy as a clam, and yet, from last Sunday to Tuesday this week, I was in a funk so deep that I could barely keep my eyes open after work. I still showed up to work with a smile on my face, cooked healthy meals, tidied up, and even planned a round of golf for some exercise (thank you, rain, for cancelling that one because I was DONE by 8:30 pm). I go through these waves from time to time, bursts of motivation followed by droughts where I feel like I’m wading through molasses. 

The Weight of It All (Literally)

For years, my health has been a challenge, and now that it’s slowly coming under control, my weight has stepped into the spotlight again as my biggest hurdle. I have a gym membership I don’t use, a phone full of in-home workout videos from TikTok and YouTube that I don't do, and I honestly follow every wellness group on Facebook and Instagram under the sun, and I'm still tired. I start strong with lunchtime walks and evening strolls, but the fatigue creeps in and I stop cold turkey. I’ve even looked into weight loss options like Ozempic but between the price and my gut feelings, I’m hesitant.

The Ego vs. The Heart

Here’s the wild part: my youngest son is constantly filling my cup with little words of affirmation like, “Mum, you’re so beautiful, do you know that?” and my husband loves every inch of me exactly as I am, and he doesn’t just say it, he showers me with love and affirmation every single day, and yet, when I look in the mirror, I often meet my own reflection with criticism instead of compassion. My ego, well it's the loudest most stubborn part of me that still measures my worth by clothing sizes or numbers on a scale, and speaks loudly over all of the kindness that I'm so blessed to have around me. We recently got our wedding photos back, and for the first time in my life, I couldn’t see my own beauty in them. I know it’s my ego talking, but the truth is, I caught myself thinking I had ruined every single photo I was in. Ouch! That moment was a wake-up call. Proof that I still have work to do, not just on my body, but on my self-perception. Because the real “ruin” isn’t in the pictures, it’s in the way I’ve been talking to myself lately.

Honouring the Journey

I’ve decided I’m not waiting until I’m a certain size to live my life. I want to honour my journey while I’m still on it. That means that I am choosing to:

1. Being Gentle With Myself
   No more calling my body names. If I wouldn’t say it to my best friend, I won't say it to myself.

2. Finding Joy in Movement
   Exercise doesn’t have to be punishment. It can be a dance in my kitchen, a walk in the sunshine, or even that rainy-day golf plan that didn’t happen (but hey, I planned it!).

3. Manifesting the Life I Deserve
   I believe in the power of words and thoughts. If I keep saying I’m “too tired” or “too heavy,” my brain will believe it. If I start saying, “I’m getting stronger,” my actions will follow.

4. Celebrating the Small Wins
   A healthy dinner instead of fast food? Win. Choosing to rest instead of push to burnout? Win. Drinking more water today than yesterday? Win. I just know that small consistent steps will be my saving grace. 

For Anyone on This Struggle Bus With Me

If you’re reading this and thinking, “Yep, I’m on that struggle bus too,” then here’s what I want you to know:

💛 You are not broken for having a beautiful life and still struggling.
💛 Your worth has nothing to do with your weight.
💛 You don’t have to be perfect to make progress.
💛 You can love yourself now and still want to make changes.

The journey isn’t about getting off the struggle bus overnight, it’s about slowly taking the wheel, learning the route, and turning it into a joy ride, and if you ever doubt how incredible you are, just remember my son’s words: “You’re so beautiful, do you know that?”
Because guess what babe, you are.

Cheers,

Coach Jo <3